Reading lengthy reviews of your favourite movies and TV shows can be tedious (especially if there are no pictures). Don’t you wish that their plot lines could be condensed into a single sentence? That is the premise behind the game called “Uncomfortable Plot Summaries” which yields some humourous (often cynical) results. Here are some of my favourites:
- ALIENS: An unplanned pregnancy leads to complications.
- BATMAN: Wealthy man assaults the mentally ill.
- DIE HARD: Dysfunctional cop saves marriage by murdering foreign national.
- KILL BILL: Irresponsible mother wants custody of her child.
- BLADE RUNNER: Man with no apparent skill stumbles into escaped robots, fails to kill most, fucks one.
- LORD OF THE RINGS: Midget destroys stolen property.
- ROCKY: White man beats black man.
- SUPERBAD: Boys plan date-rape, sleep together.
- TRANSPORTER: Repressed homosexual kills employers.
- TERMINATOR: An unplanned pregnancy leads to complications.
- SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE: Man is betrayed by darker-skinned brother, escapes poverty through blind luck in pursuit of light-skinned woman.
- TRANSFORMERS: Army lures enormous, hostile aliens into urban area, needlessly killing thousands.
- CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND: Husband abandons family responsibilities to trespass on military outpost for noisy light show.
- MEMENTO: Brain damaged people are easy to fuck with, but will eventually kill you.
- SHOWGIRLS: Women empower themselves through public nudity.
- LOST: Nothing makes sense.
- HEROES: With great power comes ridiculous problems.
- WIZARD OF OZ: What happens over the rainbow, stays over the rainbow.
See many more at (postmodernbarney.com) [via Metafilter]
