Author: Lucy Furr

I heart onelargeprawn.

Categories
Awesomeness Literature

Read Dracula in real time

Binder of beautiful and elegant books, Whitney Sorrow, is posting each entry of Jonathan Harker’s diary (the diary entries make up the Bram Stoker novel Dracula) on her blog on the actual days that the entries are written. She started on the 3rd of May which is Jonathan’s first entry. However, I’m a bit slow on the uptake and only found it today.

It’s a pretty cool way to experience this epistolary novel whether you’ve read it before or not, as you get to experience the action at the same time as the characters do. Read your daily instalment at Dracula but I warn you, one entry a day just makes you want more!

Categories
Arty Awesomeness

Ross Horsley Rocks!

I know I posted about this guy like a minute ago, but I just found further evidence of his dark brilliance in the form of his experimental photo comic strip called the Wesleys on his other blog Musty Moments.

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Ross is apparently a timid librarian by day, and a frenzied fan of gory slasher flicks by night. Oh well no-one’s perfect I guess.

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More at The Wesleys.

Categories
Arty Awesomeness Cautionary Tales Literature

My first dictionary: a contemporary lexicon

Ross Horsley, a cynic after my own dark heart has a blog called My First Dictionary which is presented just like those picture book dictionaries we used in primary school to learn vocabulary. This dictionary however probably isn’t a great one to start little Brad and Brittany on. It’s without a doubt very honest to the 21st century, and the contrast between the brightly coloured illustrations and the word definitions makes it even darker and more cynical. Some might find it disturbing, but in this “nanny-state” age of over censorship and escapist candy floss endings, I find it refreshing. Like a slice of bitter lemon after a fatty pork chop.

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Found at the ever brilliant Neatorama.

Categories
Entertainment Useful/Useless Info Video Clips

Battlestar Galactica – It’s not the end!

I’m one of those hopeless people that gets all depressed and a little crazy when one of their favourite TV series comes to an end. You should have seen me after the finale of the first season of Lost – hatters weren’t in it mate. I couldn’t sleep at night because I hadn’t gotten my weekly dose of jungle drama, spent all day wondering what was happening to Sayid and Kate and Jack on that godforsaken piece of rock in the middle of nowhere, talked about all the characters all the time to anyone who would listen including the cats – I think I pretty much took my whole household down crazy street with me.

Anyway Lost has been replaced in my affections by the brilliant and gripping Battlestar Galactica. We watched the last episode ever the other night, and as you may have guessed, I’ve been feeling pretty down (although that might also be the gentle caresses of PMS). Today I was reading some arb non-sense about second hand smoke and one of those nearly always awful advertising banners caught my eye. Usually I can just zone that crap out, but this one was different, special even. It was advertising  a spin-off of my beloved Battlestar Galactica, and it’s called Caprica. Oh yes oh yay. The series is a prequel of sorts, set 58 years before the holocaust at the hands of the dreaded Cylons on the planet Caprica. It might not be as good as Battle Star Galactica – some people are bitching about it already, but I can’t wait to see it nonetheless.

Here for your viewing pleasure is a sneaky preview.

Or you can watch in here at YouTube.

Categories
Entertainment Featured Literature Useful/Useless Info

Shaggy dogs

Just the other day, I found myself a new and surprisingly innocent form of entertainment on the intertubes. They’re called shaggy dog tales, and are usually long involved stories that end with a pointless or plainly absurd punchline. Most of the punchlines are heavy on puns – and y’all know how I love a good pun. My most favourite to date involves some french foreign legionnaires and dessert in the desert, but it’s quite long winded, so here’s one of the shorter shaggy dogs (more of a shaggy puppy I suppose) for your entertainment:

A mother lion and father lion had gone off hunting, and had told their two cubs not to wander away. However, a couple of small wildebeests ambled by, and the young lions could not resist the temptation to try out their own hunting skills. They ran out, chased after the animals, killed them, and started eating them.

Just as the cubs were reaching the end of their meal, the parents appeared in the distance. One of the baby lions turned to the other, and said: “That is the end of the gnus. Here again are the head lions.”

If you liked that one, there are loads more here.

Categories
Music

Coke Fest 2009

Were you there? Did you have an AWESOME time? We were there, and to be perfectly honest with you, we had an almost awesome time. There were lots of pros (the opposite of cons NOT those ladies who charge for loving you long time) like that fact that there was lots of space, the grass was pretty comfy to sit on, the loos stayed fairly clean until at least 3pm, the SA bands were great, Snow Patrol were super great, and Prawn1 worked his magic and got us into Golden Circle. There were a few cons (the opposite of the aforementioned pros NOT the scary crim types with tattoos on their necks) such as there being very little shade, the price of drinks and food was too high, the fact that the so-called genius that is Oasis looked incredibly bored throughout their set, and that it took some of us 2 hours to get out of the venue when it was all over.

Overall we had a decent time, and I particularly enjoyed watching all the other concert goers. There was a wide variety of middle class whites aged from about 17 to 50, and a sprinkling of other South Africans. Amongst the whities, there was a fair number of teenage Britney look-alikes which provided the most entertainment for our little group – with their too short skirts and denim shorts barely clothing dimply thighs, their bottle-blond hair under oh-so-2006-trucker caps, and their ample young bosoms spilling out of their tops. For some, the  perfect combination of teenage naivety, baby fat and trailer trash sexiness, I just find those poor girls hilarious. I’m more inclined to take emos in those ridiculous skinny jeans that always sag horribly over the bum more seriously. Oh, oh another really funny thing at the concert were the text messages that scrolled across the two huge screens in the intervals between bands. We saw some real prizes about how this girl and that girl were dirty whores, and how another girl was giving blow-jobs in the loos, and the best was one that said something to the effect of “I’m having such an amazing time all thanks to you my darling shnookie-pie love bug John. All my love Mom”.

Every year when 5 fm starts their silly teasing over the Coke Fest line-up, I hope in vain that we’ll get international artists that are really worth seeing like The RHCP, Eddie Vedder, Wyclef Jean, or The Kings of Leon, and every year we get maybe one decent band, and some washed up, complacent, arrogant twits like Oasis. SIGH.

Anyhow Dear Readers drop us a line and let us know what you thought of the event.

I’d like to thank Fleanne – good friend and loyal supporter of Onelargeprawn for our tickets to Coke Fest 2009. Nice one Fleanne!

Categories
Featured Politics Smolitics

ANC vs ID catfight

It’s a jungle out there peeps! Yesterday Prawn posted a hilarious sound bite thingy that compared the South African Presidential race to a horse race. Well this morning I saw something almost as funny on News24.com. Apparently an ANC official from Warmsand, which lies somewhere between the middle of nowhere and the back of beyond, savaged the ear of an ID supporter. Both the ANC official and the ID supporter are women. The election violence has started and it’s with a political catfight! Oh yes Oh yay South African politics are just brilliant this year – they’re a laugh a minute.

You can read the whole story here.

Categories
Awesomeness History Inspirational Designs

Don’t mess with this scooter

I’ve always thought that scooters or vespas or whatever you call those silly little motorbike-type things were just well…silly. Until I saw this baby on Neatorama.

Apparently, these awesome scooter-canons were born in France after World War II. Devasated by years of war and German occupation, the French could not afford to buy or build sophisticated military equipment. Never ones to give up when the going got tough, the French made the best of what was available, and came up with the brilliant idea of mounting 75mm recoiless rifles on scooters. Click here to read more about these little devils

Categories
Animal Kingdom Cautionary Tales

Pure grossness

I’m not generally one of those precious overly-squeamish girly girls, but this piece of nasty did make me feel a little faint. Staff at an aquarium in the UK had been puzzled by the mysterious nocturnal savaging of a reef and it’s inhabitants. So the staff decided to lay a trap, and this is the thing that they caught.

It’s a four-foot long polychaete worm that has been named “Barry”. I don’t know about you, but I would have named it something a bit more fitting like “Jabba” or “Freakshow”.  Apparently these worms are capable not only of devouring large pieces of coral and small tropical fish, but also of inflicting permanent numbness on humans. So remember this the next time you’re enjoying a little snorkel in some tropical paradise – you could be the victim of a permanent numbness attack by one of Barry’s free-ranging cousins.

I found this story here.

Categories
Awesomeness Cartoons & Comics Politics Smolitics

Me old China – again

I just couldn’t resist but I promise that this is my last China Bashing post for the week day. This pic looks suspiciously like it was taken near Victoria Falls on the Zimbabwean side. If it was, I’d hate to see the next pic in the series because g-d knows what would have happened  to the poor woman – almost everything available in Zimbabwe now comes from China (via South Africa mostly).

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For more sort of like this visit Superpoop.