Categories
Game Reviews

We Review: Sébastien Loeb Rally EVO

I’m not the world’s greatest rally driving fan (Ed: Or sports fan, for that matter, but whatever), so it should come as very little surprise to any of our regular readers that I had absolutely no idea who Sébastien Loeb is. The last rally driver I was peripherally aware of was Colin McRae, and I had no idea that he had left for the great rally track in the sky. My ill knowledge has changed a lot with the introduction of Sébastien Loeb Rally EVO, one of the most technical racing games I’ve played (which says a lot about how many I play). So while I strap into my rally suit and go alert my co-driver, how about you mosey over to the track and I’ll meet you there?

Categories
Game Reviews

We Review: Pokemon Super Mystery Dungeon

Pokemon Mystery Dungeon has been running for just over 10 years as a series, and we reviewed the last one back in 2013 when it first surfaced. It’s been three years, and we have a new Mystery Dungeon game, this time titled Pokemon Super Mystery Dungeon. Have things changed significantly? Is it a better game? Is it super dungeony? How mysterious is it?? All these questions and more will receive answers when we return. But first help me into my Pokemon suit, will you?

Categories
Game Reviews

We Review: Resident Evil Origins Collection

Resident Evil is arguably one of the most successful and popular survival horror games out there, and even though later games in the series have been of arguable scariness, the first few did an amazing job. The original game for PlayStation 1 came out in 1996, making the series officially 20 years old. The Resident Evil Origins Collection contains HD remakes of Resident Evil (the first game, since it comes without a number), and the prequel, titled Resident Evil Zero. I get my S.T.A.R.S. gear ready, grab my zombie killing gear, and head for Raccoon City to kill some evil (un)dead.

Categories
Game Reviews

We Review: Gravity Rush Remastered

Gravity Rush first made its appearance on the PS Vita back in 2012, and it was dubbed one of the best games you’ve never played. It featured a gravity-shifting lass named Kat in her adventures in the fictional town of Hekseville. In time for the sequel due later this year, we have a PS4 HD remaster of the game, so I got my gravity going to find out how it matches up with the original.

Categories
Flash Games Mindlessness

Friday Timewaster: Z-Type

We know, we know. Friday afternoons are where productivity levels are at the utmost worst. You’ve eaten your lunch, you’ve had some coffee, and now your head is fuzzy from a week of too many numbers. Or colors. Or words. Or graphs. Or people. Darn those graphs! It sounds to me like you need a little something to do while waiting for 5pm to roll around. How about trying this fun little browser-based game that lets you practice your typing and spelling? Z-Type is a shoot-em-up in the style of Galaxian (created by a guy called Dominic Szablewski who writes his thoughts in his blog), although instead of repeatedly pressing fire, you have to type the word that each enemy displays. This locks your ship onto that enemy, blasting it from the skies in a shower of sparks and fire and death and destruction. Glorious!

Z-Type screenshot

Surprising addictive? Yes. Enough to get you to 5pm? Probably. Give it a shot, Commander, and let us know your high score in the comments.

Link: Phoboslab Z-Type

Categories
Game Reviews

We Review: The Banner Saga (Console Edition)

The Banner Saga (official site) was originally released for PC on Steam at the beginning of 2014, and the game was so incredibly well received that the developer, Stoic, has released a console version of this tactical role-playing game based in Nordic mythology. I’m going to approach this review with the assumption that you’ve not played the PC version, so let’s get all Nordic up in here and find out what the game is all about.

Categories
Game Reviews

We Review: Mario & Luigi: Paper Jam Bros.

Mario & Luigi: Paper Jam Bros is the fifth installment of the Mario & Luigi series of games, which started with Superstar Saga in back in 2003. The series, for those who have not experienced it yet, is essentially a JPRG starring the eponymous, infamous plumbing brothers (who, in retrospect, haven’t actually done any real plumbing in…years). I grab my markers, my glue, and my construction paper and head for the hills of the Mushroom Kingdom to see what this game is all about.

Categories
Awesomeness

Happy Holidays (A Play)

[Scene: Prawn HQ. HIGH LORD PRAWN sits upon his magnificent throne as thralls scurry about, hanging bunting, lights, and assorted Christmas-themed decorations. A fussy-looking prawn stands in the center, yelling orders.]

FUSSY-LOOKING PRAWN: You there! Move that snowflake slightly to the left!
[Enter a large, officious, white duck dressed in military regalia.]

HIGH LORD PRAWN: Ah, Tyrannical Duc! What news from our loving subjects?

TYRANNICAL DUCK: It’s “duck”, lord, not “duc”.

HIGH LORD PRAWN: How on earth did you spot that typo?

TYRANNICAL DUCK: We ducks have very good hearing. And vision. And good sledgehammers for breaking down fourth walls. [TYRANNICAL DUCK looks pointed out of the narrative directly at you and winks, before turning back to face HIGH LORD PRAWN] Your subjects say that we should thank our loyal readers and supporters, and announce the Time of the Christmas Holidays.

HIGH LORD PRAWN: Goodness! Is it that time already? Well then! [Takes TYRANNICAL DUCK’S fourth-wall breaking hammer] To all our loyal readers, supporters, followers, and other assorted personages of varying importance! Happy holidays to you all and thank you for all your support! May the new year…

TYRANNICAL DUCK (leaning in and whispering): That’s “New Year”, lord. With capital letters.

HIGH LORD PRAWN (adjusting crown): Ahem…may the NEW YEAR usher in a new age of grace, wonder, and prosperity…

TYRANNICAL DUCK (whispering): And video game reviews…

HIGH LORD PRAWN: And video game reviews to you all! (Gets in sleigh): On Dasher, on Dander, on Comet and Vomit, on Pluto, on Venus, on Dandruff, and Pe…

TYRANNICAL DUCK (interjecting): Happy holidays, everyone!

Categories
Entertainment Movie Reviews

We Review: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens

Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens is the film that everyone everywhere has been excited for, and yet fearful that it was going to be another Phantom Menace. I’m not going to do any clever preambles or intros here. Let’s get straight into this review of Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens. It’s what we’re here for, right? So, a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…

Categories
Game Reviews

We Review: Xenoblade Chronicles X

Back in April, we reviewed Xenoblade Chronicles 3D, a portable remake of the Wii game of the same name, and we rated it quite favourably. Following that, we now have Xenoblade Chronicles X (pronounced as “Xenoblade Chronicles Cross”) for the Wii U, a spiritual sequel to Xenoblade Chronicles 3D. If you enjoy massive games with a huge emphasis on exploration, pay attention. Oh, and transforming mechs. It has transforming mechs. Who doesn’t love a good, transforming mech?