Reddit Meets Tom Swifty

I love puns. In my ever-so-humble opinion, a well-formed pun can be regarded as one of the highest, most fantastically funny forms of wit. A very specific, reasonably old subset of puns, called the Tom Swifty, has made a funny resurgence at Reddit. Some of the funniest ones in the thread include the thread title:

“I think I have split personalities,” said Steve, being frank.

And a few more:

• “I ALREADY TOLD YOU. I’M NOT DROWNING!!!” said Tom, deep in denial.
• “I lost my bouquet,” said Tom lackadaisically.
• “I manufacture table tops,” said Tom counterproductively.
• “They had to amputate them both at the ankles,” said Tom, defeated.
• “I think I might be gay,” said Tom, half in earnest.
• “They escorted the criminals downstairs,” Tom said condescendingly.
• “I don’t rub my feet on the carpet anymore,” Tom said ecstatically.
• “Please help! My left ventricle is collapsing,” said Tom halfheartedly.
• “Who discovered radium?” asked Marie curiously.

See the full thread on Reddit. There are just way too many to list! Here’s my own little contribution:

“I just said something about this blog post,” Tom commented.

Think of your own one? Let us know in the comments!