I think I may have mentioned this before but back in the day when I was at varsity a girl broke up with me to hook up with her Spanish dance instructor – he taught her how to dance and she taught him how to speak English. I believe it was short-lived though, as he gave her the clap. I don’t really hold any grudges but I don’t speak to that bitch anymore. No seriously, I jest ;-)
In the same vein as Fuck My Life and Texts from Last Night, a new website – Why My Ex Sucks – asks users to tell them why their ex-partners were complete douchebags or douchBaguettes. Bitterness needs to be condensed into three reasons.
Here are some of the submissions:
Practice Makes Pervert
1. He broke my wrist when he insisted on arm wrestling me. He’s six foot three. I’m five foot even.
2. He didn’t bring me to his prom because “his dream girl” asked him last minute.
3. He cheated on me. And expected to make me feel better about it because the girls “meant nothing to him” and he was just “practicing for me.”
Healthy Habit
1. He smoked crack and stole my car. My car keys had my apartment keys attached to them, and so I was locked out for three days while the cops looked for him.
2. When we broke up and I kicked him out, he proceeded to uninstall and steal our toilet.
3. I went on vacation with my girlfriends and returned to find that he had sold all of our electronics for crack!
No Greek God
1. He BEGGED me to fly from Greece to Paris to stay with him for 3 weeks. When I got there, he all of a sudden wanted me to leave. He had made me pre-pay for the fucking tickets, so I was stuck there with no money to leave earlier.
2. When broke up with him he asked my 14-year old sister out to make me jealous so I would take him back.
3. He thought it was weird that i showered almost every day. He showered every 2-3 weeks and only because his parents told him to.
More tales of relationships gone awry at Why My Ex Sucks.
6 replies on “Relationship Fail: Why my ex Sucks”
Wow I feel normal, just scarred of whats out there now :sweat:
Relationships are like optical illusions I suppose – sometimes you see them for what they are, and sometimes you don’t (until it’s too late).
Normality is good. I had a girlfriend once who enrolled in the “I love you. But I will crush you” school of thought. It did not end well.
normality, that is just a word to make one feel happy about being abnormal.
everyone is special in a fubar way
Maybe normal isn’t the right word. Fortunate? Knock on Wood. By normal I think I meant, no crack involved :) . Some of the statements on that site are bizarre to say the least.
Why My Ex Sucks is addictive! I just can’t stop reading – some would say it’s because I enjoy hearing about the misfortunes of others – truly though I’m just finding it amazing what absolute freaks people can be, and how much shit some people are willing to put up with for “love” or the illusion there of. Also it’s a bit of a gloat thing really because I’m so lucky in love :)
Aww I love you to sweetums :heart: